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日志
    3月20日

    I'm So Postmodern- The Bedroom Philosopher

    I'm so postmodern that I just don't talk anymore,
    I wear different coloured t-shirts according to my mood.

    I'm so postmodern that I work from home
    As a surf life saving consumer hotline.

    I'm so postmodern that all my clothes are made out of sleeping bags,
    I don't need pockets, I'm a pocket myself.

    I'm so postmodern I go to parties I'm not invited to,
    and locate the vegemite and write my name on everyone.

    I'm so postmodern that I write reviews for funerals,
    and heckle at weddings, from inside a suitcase.

    I'm so postmodern I'm going to adopt a child,
    and teach him to knit, and call him Adolf Diggler.

    I'm so postmodern that I breakdance in waiting rooms,
    play Yahtzee in nightclubs, at three in the afternoon.

    I'm so postmodern I only go on dates that last thirteen minutes,
    via walky-talky, while hiding under the bed.

    I'm so postmodern I invite strangers to my house,
    And put on a slide show, of other people's nans.

    I'm so postmodern I went home and typed up everything you said,
    And printed it out in Wingdings, and gave it back to you.

    I'm so postmodern I held an art exhibition-
    A Chuppa Chup stuck to a swimming cap, and noone was invited.

    I'm so postmodern I make alphabet soup,
    And dye it purple, and pour it on the lawn.

    I'm so postmodern I request Hey Mona on karaoke,
    Then sing my life story, to the tune of My Sharona.

    I'm so postmodern I only think in palendromic haikus-
    Madam, I Glenelg, I'm Adam.

    I'm so postmodern that I sit down to wee,
    And stand up to poo, at job interviews.

    I'm so postmodern that I dress up as Santa,
    In the middle of August, and haunt golf courses.

    I'm so postmodern that I cut off all my hair,
    And knitted it into a beanie, and threw it off a bridge.

    I'm so postmodern that I stole everyone's mail,
    And cut them up into a ransom note and hid it in a thermos.

    I'm so postmodern I take my leggo to the supermarket,
    And build my own shopping trolley, and only buy one nut.

    I'm so postmodern I wrote a letter to the council-
    ...I think it was 'M.'

    I'm so postmodern I bought a round the world plane ticket,
    And stuffed my clothes with eggplant and pretended it was me.

    I'm so postmodern I've got a tattoo of my pin number,
    In heiroglyphics on my neighbour's guide dog.

    I'm so postmodern I fought my way into parliment,
    And made a law banning Nuttelex, and then moved to Spain.

    I'm so postmodern that I iron all my lettuce leaves,
    Put my t-shirts in the crisper- they're real crisp.

    I'm so postmodern I give live mice to buskers,
    Dirty tea-towels to the Mormons, and pavlova to crabs.

    I'm so postmodern that I live in a tent,
    On a platform of skateboards that's tied to a tram.

    I'm so postmodern I write four-thousand word essays,
    On the cultural significance of party pies.

    I'm so postmodern I recite Shakespear at KFC drive-thru's,
    Through a megaphone, in sign language.

    I'm so postmodern I'm going to watch the Olympics,
    On a black & white TV, with the sound down.

    I'm so postmodern I go to the gym after hours,
    Push up against the door, then cry myself to sleep.

    I'm so postmodern I wrote a trilogy of novels,
    From the perspective of a possum that Jesus patted once.

    I'm so postmodern that I marry all my friends,
    Soak myself in metho, and tell them that they've changed.

    I'm so postmodern I bought every book written in 1963,
    As a reading challenge, and clogged up a waterslide.

    I'm so postmodern I think I might be a god,
    In my undies rolling in sugar, in the carpark of a rodeo.

    I'm so postmodern I prerecorded this song,
    And laced a message subliminally telling Shane Porteous to buy a smock.



    18:50 | 写入日志

    评论 (8)

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    May Madly发表:
    Maddie I really wanna talk to you soon again on msn please! Last time I donno what happened and you went offline! miss you
     
    p.s. sweet song
     
    your friend,
    may
    4 月 15 日
    brookina发表:
    lol i love that song don't really understand it but like it
    from brooke
    4 月 11 日
    SaunderrsJ​ames发表:
    maddie, you wher never serious in  life :P
    4 月 3 日
    没有名字发表:
    dude that eight so wasn't there when I typed it.
    3 月 21 日
    没有名字发表:
    meow *cleans self with pores*
    Whoa are you litterallly a melting clock?
    How very beatnic of you.
    i love maddam.
    Jess is a mouse8*squeak*
     RIP Nijna Turtle
    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
    rawr
    3 月 21 日
    maddie. or is it?发表:
    yes, i must try that *thumbs up*
    I just realised that I was told today it would be interesting to see me getting my head chewed up by a bear with corks on its teeth...
    3 月 20 日
    SwiTch_97发表:
    lmfao, those are awesome :D
    I shall also take life less seriously
    Try getting a blow dryer sit ina  car and point it at cars driving past on a highway or something.
     
    Cheers!
    Kyall
    3 月 20 日
    maddie. or is it?发表:
    I think I shall try take life less seriously as of now.
    3 月 20 日

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